I couldn’t breathe. My lungs were begging for oxygen, and my heart was racing faster than a greyhound chasing a fake rabbit on a racetrack. The sound of every beat was deafening. My head was about to explode.
I ought to be more responsible. That’s what I tell myself every time I mess up, and always when it’s already too late.
I must have lectured myself for the millionth time, to no avail. I am who I am. A troublemaker.
“Where have you been, mate?” Matt asked as I threw myself into the seat next to him.
“Can’t breathe,” were the only two words I could manage.
He stared at me, concerned. I must have looked like someone who had been chased by a gang of street fighters or a serial killer and had only just managed to escape.
My eyes were about to pop, my burgundy face held together by some biological miracle, my mouth open and gasping for air. Hair glued to my forehead with sweat. I swear I could feel the salty drops running down my temples.
Dark patches under my armpits were proudly displaying the struggle I had just gone through. The back of my T-shirt was another witness to my sprint across the terminal.
While I was trying to recover, the whole scene replayed in my head in slow motion.
The Buffet Was a Terrible Idea
We arrived at the airport two hours in advance, making sure we had enough time to drop off our baggage at the check-in desk. Then we went through security control and, afterwards, took advantage of some duty-free shopping. The usual procedure.
When we reached the departure lounge, it was completely packed. In Malta, the airport is small and easy to navigate, and the boarding gates are clearly signposted; however, it gets very crowded. Groups of people were hanging around, creating a constant buzzing noise, with nowhere to sit. Annoying.
We checked the departure board.
DELAYED.
Jeez. A great start. We could have stayed at the hotel much longer and might have enjoyed the free buffet even more.
The memory of that endless buffet, with perfectly cut fruit, cheese platters, hams, bread, and every possible variation of eggs, made me hungry again. Boiled, fried, scrambled… they had everything. Even a full English breakfast.
Guests were completely spoiled for choice. Cereals? Yoghurts? Cakes? Pastries? You name it.
We didn’t have to rush. I could have eaten more. That second slice of cake I could have demolished…
And just like that, I started to drift back into the taste… the soft sponge, the fruity sweetness on my tongue…
Just imagining that delicious, heavenly taste was enough to make me slobber like a Great Dane, staring longingly at my master’s plate.
STOP IT!
I ordered my brain to shut down with the last bit of self-control I had left.
One More Drink Won’t Hurt
Back to reality.
“Let’s go to the VIP lounge,” I said, still trying to fight back the recurring image of the delicious sponge cake.
“Splendid idea,” Matt replied.
Do you know what they offer in the VIP lounge? A luxury experience. A nice relaxation area, complimentary drinks, free-flow alcohol, and even more food.
We bought the pass, dropped our carry-on luggage by the nearest empty seats, and went on another food-and-drink adventure.
I don’t know about you, but my problem with places like this is that I tend to overindulge.
We started drinking.
“Tom, watch out, you’re not used to drinking this much!” my friend warned me.
But who cares? It’s all free.
So I tried this and that, starting with gin and tonic, moving on to whisky, then fruit-flavoured vodka.
I was already feeling a bit tipsy, so the logical next step was to fill a plate with food that suddenly looked like the best thing I had ever seen.
We checked the board. Some flights were cancelled. God. I hoped they wouldn’t cancel ours.
A minute later, our flight information flickered again: another 30-minute delay.
Perfect.
More complimentary drinks, then.
And fun we certainly had.
At last, boarding was announced. Gate 4.
A Brief Disappearance
“I need to pee,” I said. “You go ahead, I’ll catch you at the gate.”
Those were the last words I said to Matt before running off to the toilet. Thank God I remembered my hand luggage. This could have ended more dramatically.
I must have blacked out or something, because when I came round, twenty minutes had passed and I was completely disoriented, with five missed calls from him.
I shouldn’t have been drinking.
Too late.
I checked my watch and ran to Gate 4. I swear I could have been a sprinter in another life.
Something Felt Very Wrong
When I arrived at Gate 4, all passengers were already on board. I was the last one.
“Please let me in,” I begged like a child.
The flight attendant scanned my boarding pass.
Nothing.
She tried again.
Nothing.
She took my phone and carefully checked the details.
“Are you flying to Seville?”
“Yes!”
“This plane is going to Paris. You are at the wrong gate.”
She smiled. I didn’t.
Confused, I looked again at the gate number, desperate for her to be wrong.
Gate 4.
She must have been mistaken. A naive thought crossed my mind.
As she followed my gaze, she said firmly:
“There was a last-minute change. A boarding confusion. Your flight to Seville is now at Gate 1.”
Panic doesn’t even begin to describe it.
The adrenaline hit me so hard I sobered up instantly. Faster than I had allowed myself to get drunk.
“This is the final boarding call for passenger Thomas Shufflebottom, booked on flight FR1409 to Seville. Please proceed to Gate 1 immediately…”
For crying out loud.
That’s all I needed, my ridiculous surname echoing across the entire terminal.
The Fastest Run of My Life
I started running again. Full speed ahead, carry-on trolley dragging behind me.
“You almost missed your flight, you know,” Matt chimed in later with a half-drunk grin.
“No shit, Sherlock,” I replied.
“Listen, shall we order some booze on board?” Matt was already ready to continue what we had started at the airport.
“Nah, I’m done, mate. I’d better sleep it off before I face my wife.”
I closed my eyes, swearing to myself that I would never do anything so stupid again, knowing full well it was a promise I would never be able to keep.
📘 Phrase Glossary
| Word / Expression | Meaning |
|---|---|
| to no avail | without any success or positive result |
| gasping for air | struggling to breathe |
| held together by some biological miracle | humorous exaggeration meaning someone looks physically destroyed |
| replayed in my head | returned vividly to my memory |
| duty-free shopping | shopping at the airport without certain taxes |
| spoiled for choice | having too many good options available |
| demolish (food) | eat something very quickly and enthusiastically |
| drift back into | mentally return to a thought, memory, or sensation |
| slobber | allow saliva to escape from the mouth, usually because of hunger |
| recurring image | a thought or mental picture that repeatedly returns |
| complimentary drinks | drinks provided for free |
| free-flow alcohol | unlimited alcoholic drinks |
| overindulge | consume too much food or drink |
| tipsy | slightly drunk |
| flickered | changed or flashed suddenly |
| black out | temporarily lose consciousness |
| disoriented | confused and unable to think clearly |
| sprint across | run very fast through a place |
| naive thought | an innocent or unrealistic idea |
| sobered up instantly | became mentally clear very quickly after drinking |
| echoing across the terminal | repeating loudly through the airport |
| chimed in | joined a conversation suddenly |
| sleep it off | recover from alcohol by sleeping |
| knowing full well | being completely aware of something |
❓Quiz Time
🧠 Grammar explained – Modal Verbs for Speculation & Criticism
In English, we often use modal verbs to:
- speculate about what probably happened
- criticise past decisions
- express regret
This structure is extremely common in storytelling.
🔹 Must Have + Past Participle
Used when we are almost certain something happened.
Examples from the story:
“I must have lectured myself for the millionth time.”
“I must have blacked out or something.”
Meaning:
➡️ The speaker is making a strong conclusion about the past.
🔹 Could Have + Past Participle
Used for unreal possibilities or missed opportunities.
Examples from the story:
“We could have stayed at the hotel much longer.”
“I could have been a sprinter in another life.”
Meaning:
➡️ Something was possible, but it did not happen.
🔹 Shouldn’t Have + Past Participle
Used to criticise past actions or express regret.
Example from the story:
“I shouldn’t have been drinking.”
Meaning:
➡️ The speaker believes the action was a mistake.
🔹 Might Have + Past Participle
Used when something was possible in the past, but uncertain.
Example inspired by the story:
“I might have missed the flight if the boarding gate had closed earlier.”
Meaning:
➡️ The speaker is unsure, but sees it as a possible result.
Tip: Modals in the past often combine with “have + past participle” to talk about past possibilities, deductions, or hypothetical situations.
🤓 Now you try it!
✍️ Write your story
Challenge!
Have you ever had a travel disaster or embarrassing airport experience?
Write about:
- where you were going
- what went wrong
- how you felt
- what you should have done differently
Try to use:
might have, must have, could have, should have
Ask your AI to review it using this prompt:
“Please review my writing. Check if I used modal verbs correctly.
📝 What You Practised in This English Story
In this story, you learned useful airport and travel vocabulary, including expressions related to boarding, delays, luggage, and flying.
You also practised modal verbs for speculation and criticism:
- must have
- could have
- should have
- might have
These structures help English learners describe regrets, past mistakes, and uncertain situations naturally in conversation and storytelling.
This lesson also showed how native speakers use humour, exaggeration, and informal expressions in real-life English narratives.
Ever read something that made you laugh, cringe, and secretly learn a language without even trying? That’s exactly what Unana Boo graded readers do. They’re not just stories. They’re messy, chaotic, hilariously real moments from life abroad, written so you can actually understand them and enjoy the ride.
The real magic happens when you unlock the exercises — the vocabulary, grammar, quizzes, and speaking prompts that turn chaos into progress. If you’re ready to stop “studying English” and start living it through stories, your next lesson is already waiting.
Disclaimer: Inspired by a real story and adapted into a fictional graded reader for English learners.